June 1, 2004

The second amendment and the paranormal

I must voice my concern on the importance of the second amendment. Yes, I do think one of the important reasons we have it is so that the citizens can overthrow the government in the eventuality it becomes corrupt via the movie Equilibrium, but my next reason is more out there--and if you have not yet had cause to question my sanity, you will soon.

We need guns to protect us from the zombies.

Yes, zombies. There are no known zombies yet, but I think between environmental waste, nuclear weapons, exotic and man-made diseases, and supernatural forces which may or may not exist such as Armageddon, we're due for zombies in our lifetime. What's the best way to ensure that a zombie doesn't get to you? Well first off have a good four-wheel drive truck with a deer guard, and second, have a shotgun handy.
With most zombie varieties, you need to shoot the brain or the spinal chord to render them harmless, and no melee weapon short of a katana is going to achieve that. I hear salt stops zombies of the voodoo variety when thrown in their mouths, so keep that handy too.

So clearly we need the second amendment. Oh sure, you may laugh at me now, but you'll be wishing you had a gun when the zombies burst through your door.

On a related note, I've been playing typing of the dead a lot recently (a mod of house of the dead two that helps your typing skills). Now if you happen to have a keyboard handy that kills the undead, by all means feel free to use that instead.