Karate will see you through this disaster

Sign says:

女性 women

中高生 middle and highschoolers

病弱者 weak and sickly dudes

かんげい welcome

gloss: We welcome, women, children, and the infirm!

大地震 big quakes

大津波 massive tsunamis

大不況 great depressions

にまけるな！don't lose to 'em!

gloss: Overcome all the hardships that nature and the economy can throw at you!

カラテ教室 Karate class
--
If you are having problems getting that precious byoujyaku karate teacher sympathy, here is a makeup guide.

Japanese Study Links

Sign/Ad J | J Slang | J News w/Pics | J Vids
Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji! | Kanji

Anyways, Just Try It Once

Thought this an interesting way of using 兎に角 (tonikaku, anyway) that we probably wouldn't do in an English ad. It translates pretty much as per this post's title. It seems like the nuance of the Japanese "anyway" is slightly different.

You might note that sometimes I write anyway with an s. It's not really fixed in my idiolect.

Bless This Bathhouse from Thievery

After consulting with the girlfriendal unit, I determined that going to a sento may be the best way for me to get over this week-long stiff neck. A sento is a traditional Japanese bathhouse. I've been to onsens (hot-spring water bathhouses) plenty of times, but this was my first time to a sento. I could take a bath at home, but it would be very hard, and maybe the cost in gas would be about the same as the 450 yen to access a sento (I don't know).
One thing to keep in mind if you visit a bathhouse is that unlike most onsens, you need to take your own towels and soaps. Outside the sento doors, we discovered an interesting charm stuck to the wall.

It reads:盗賊除神璽 touzokujyoshinji, burglar abolish imperial?/divine-seal (this bathhouse is under holy protection from thievery). That last character usually refers to an emporer's seal, but 神璽 can refer to either the emporer's seal or the Three Divine Regalia. Ultimately, it comes from 天(あま)つ璽(しるし) (The Mark of* Heaven), so I think this is actually referring to something like that in this case.

Also of note is that both 璽 and 盗 don't have the standard amount of strokes on this sign. Older/alternative forms, I'm guessing.
--
*つ is really old Japanese for の (of, the genitive particle).

 

Japanese Study Links

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Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji! | Kanji

Bad Luck with the Ladies? Maybe You Should Consider Jewelry

 

I told you these old pic posts would fail to be daily. I took this pic with my cell in some magazine in a conbini. You need to click-zoom this one to see the guy's secret wrist magic, world-conquering laugh, and wonderful teeth.

Totally Awesome Product Literal Breakdown:

金も女も benjamins and hoes

自由になる will be freed up

次々と広がる one after another spreading out

幸運の good fortune's

連鎖爆発 chain of explosions

実現する realized

願望! dreams! 

巻き起こる swirling around

幸福の luck's

数々!! muchness!!

Yeah, I did it literally, but it still takes a lot of interpretation and the occasional making up of words to translate sales slogans.

Japanese Study Links

Sign/Ad J | J Slang | J News w/Pics | J Vids
Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji! | Kanji

Pacman: Just a Coffee Bean Junky (Junky Will Be On THR 101 TEST)

After 30 years, Japan is ready to admit the truth about Pacman. Those little dots he eats are coffee beans. I held the proof in my hands today at a conbini. Behold the 僕らのコーヒー Pacman packaging.

Quite a nice way to celebrate an anniversary. It includes a QR code to a free game, but as I can't do QR on an iPhone, I'm outta luck. Like a ghost being chased by a giant yellow mouth that just had his morning coffee.

On the subject of coffee in Japan, all Japanese 101 students learn that coffee is pronounced kōhi in Japan (it makes for an easy katakana lesson). I've always found this strange, given coffee's ateji: 珈琲. Now you 101 students are probably scratching your head because your 101 kanji doesn't go up to rarely seen kanji like these. Prompting me to take a

C-c-cc-coffee Breakdown:
珈: ornamental hairpin (never used)
琲: string of many pearls (also never used)
gloss: coffee?!

These are truly ateji being used just for their sound. But that sound seems so off to my American ears in part because 珈 has a 力 in it's elements. Kanji with 力 inside them are usually pronounced ka. Kanji with a 非 in them are usually pronounced hi, so I'm cool with that one. So logically, it should be kahi, right?　I looked it up on Wikipedia, and it seems that the spoken word came into Japan from Holland but the ateji seem to have been put together by one Udagawa Yōan, a scholar of the Dutch (Western) world that, in between creating new Japanese words for elements, decided that coffee (dutch: koffie) was　珈琲. There were a few other kanji/katakana tried out back in the day too: 可否, カウヒイ, and 哥非乙. These all suggest a ka sound too! My guess is that at the end of the day, Chinese's 咖啡 had the most influence on the choice of ateji. But even they pronounce it kāfēi. Hey, you may be thinking I just wrote the same kanji I've been ranting again. But look close. It's time... for my first ever

Ch-ch-chinese Breakdown:
咖: coffee
啡: coffee/morphine
gloss: really awesome coffee

So there you have it. Arabic word, Dutch/Japanese pronunciation, Chinese characters, but not the right ones. If you are in Japan, see if you can spot 珈琲 or a ghost on a can or carton of coffee. But if you spot a 啡, don't touch the can.

Japanese Study Links

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Kumagaya Posters

Thought I would dust off a few pics from my old town that I found bizarre or amusing. One or two of these are not region-specific though.

What happens when comic characters get real and less blonde.


合格エナジー Energy to pass. エネルギ is the usual word for energy though, as the Japanese took in the German word for energy long ago. Curious, is there a shift going on?

熊谷はどうなる？ What will happen to Kumagaya? 熊谷の破綻を食い止めろ Put Kumagaya's bankruptcy into check! 熊谷発　日本沈没 Starting with Kumagaya, Japan with be sunk.
Hmmm, Kumagaya sounds pretty important. What's that you say? Just a gimmick? Oh.

おいしい穴新発売 The debut of the delicious hole.
A donut burger? Where's the beef?!

The only 1000￥ (about 10 dollars) store I've seen so far.
Ahhh, nostalgia, thy name be... overpriced hipster clothes? Well, I do have a bit of a bigger budget these days as my family died of dysentery...

Japanese Study Links

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Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji!

J Products That Have Caught My Eye

Sweet Sally in the alley! The longer you go without posting, the harder it gets to return. The Job has taken over my life, but at least it's a fun job and it is good exercise--my love handles may be gone soon, but I will never get a love with this schedule. Anyways, I constantly snap pics for potential posts. Let's make some happen.

I discovered the artist Feebee via some prints at a store I tweeted about. I guess you could buy them via Rakuten, but it's cheaper at the store by a bit. The following is Feebee's interpretation of Raijin.



EDIT: Reader info in the comments negates my theories coming up on the next item...
Also next to that store that sells the print, I found an image that ties into my last post, which was made three eternities ago. It is not nearly as profound as the coins from that post, but I think it may be making the 天+口+む thing I think I see vertically into 呑む (nomu, drink).




Up next is an awesomely stupid smoking ad that I've seen recently. Nice shorts, bud.

どーよ、get a load of this!

この味！This taste

日本上陸 has arrived in Japan.

The taste of manflesh. I doubt this guy really smokes.

Japanese Study Links

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Karaoke J Commercials Let's Yoji!

Sad Bunny is Waiting for You at the Conbini

Today as I rushed into Lawson's convenience store for an early meal, my eyes caught sight of this sad bunny. His caption reads:

寂しくて empty inside...
死んじゃいそう feeling like I'm gonna die
お腹が my stomach

I'm sorry, sad bunny, but I don't think the 87 calories is going to fill you up. Perhaps you'd like to eat an egg? 'Tis the season after all.

Japanese Study Links

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Japan is Gay for God

I can think of no better way to come back to regular blogging than this.

Got this in my mailbox the other day. Brilliant yaoi marketing plan from a Christian church.



The text over the sun glosses as:

Today, one of the days left for you to live, is a precious gift. God loves you.

And apparently you should spend this precious day with Joseph whispering about his technicolor dream coat into your ear.

Japanese Study Links

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Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji!

Detective Yabe Back on the Case

I've been too busy to blog, and it's a shame, because I see cool things every day. Take this poster for instance:


This is detective Yabe from the TRICK series, which is making a comeback (even though a freshly-hatched chick told us all the last movie was really the end of it all).
Yabe adjusts his wig in this pic, while the phrase 犯人はオマエや (YOU are the criminal!), in his characteristic Kansai-dialect, floats in the corner.

I'm really excited for the return of TRICK. Maybe someday I'll return to a regular blogging schedual.

Ryoma Sakamoto has Taken Over Japan!

I can't go anywhere lately without spying the famous samurai Sakamoto Ryoma, the man that helped to overthrow the Tokugawa shogunate before being assassinated on his birthday at an inn. For me, it all started with this softbank ad:

Ad breakdown (top three lines only):
supiikaa zeyo= electronic speaker+emphasis particle
shaberu zeyo= speak +emp particle
shaberu otousan supiikaa= speak+father+speaker

So this is an ad for the To-san (the father/dog from softbank commercials) speaker promotional gift.
It seems ぜよ is from Kouchi prefecture's dialect (or Tosa-dialect if you want to get more accurate).　It also seems to be an inflection of admonition. From what I've read it isn't really used by people in Kouchi anymore.

And then I heard that he was the official subject of this year's Taiga Drama. Every year Taiga Drama airs a different historical figure's life, and this time it's the Ryomaden (legend of Ryoma).

Ryoma-fever set in. I noticed he had spread like a virus to the book stores. This store section is completely dedicated to him:



Even food is not safe from his touch:



Links of interest: You may remember the actor in the drama, Masaharu Fukuyama, was featured in a karaoke training post here at THR (second one down).

Japan Probe found an ad that explores how his life could have been saved by a good car.

The Probe also found a clip where scientists reconstruct his voice.

The Tei-park museum has an exhibition of Ryoma open until the 21st of this month.

Japanese Study Links

Sign/Ad J | J Slang | J News w/Pics | J Vids
Karaoke | J Commercials | Let's Yoji!

Full Body Dude Shaving the Way of the Future?

Saw this display at a drugstore the other day:





It says:

A new practice for men

From here on out,
it's gonna be full body shaving.

Here's another one:

Take it off! Shaggy shaggy body
The herbivorous men of our age
abhor body hair

Note I felt the need to translate Japanese English into real English.
Also, the sign mentions the herbivorous man (草食男子) phenomenon as if it were a real and good thing.
--
I'm curious as to whether this post will appear on Google Buzz. If you want to follow me there, just visit my google profile at http://www.google.com/profiles/claytonian and add me!

This has been a mobile post; click the pics to visit their album

Tiger Mask Fights the Flu!

Sign Breakdown:
top line: shingata infuruenza wo yobou shimashou= Let's prevent new (swine) flu
pic one: te wo arau= wash hands
pic two: ugai wo suru = gargle
pic three: masuku wo suru = wear a mask
pic four: yobou-sesshu wo suru= innoculate

[via][edited thanks to a comment!]
--
Related: Tiger Mask makes for excellent karaoke.

Misaki Ito is Poor and Dirty

And possibly a Native American?

I was a bit confused the first time I saw this poster. Just what is going on here? The caption reads (and I have to guess, because the verb is omitted as is often the case with poster exhortations): [give] freedom to your wallet. As you may notice from the corner graphic, it turns out this is a lottery ad.

You may remember Misaki Ito from the TV version of the Densha Otoko saga. Since that came out, I've spotted her in a few dramas, but most often I see her in commercials. I saw her selling vacuums in an infomercial one day and asked my gf why she was selling out. But selling out is not really a concept that is understood in Japan. You get famous so you can be in commercials, not graduate from them. A lot of it stems from the fact that stars just aren't payed as much over here. Plus, you have to keep your face out there, or this country will forget about you fast.

So the following CM is also from the Loto 6 campaign. Look at all the poor disenfranchised people being saved by the lottery. They trust that the lottery won't make them yet poorer. Good old lottery.



So she's actually French. The thing in the right of the ad at the end is a loto ticket booth, which appear in abundance in Japan. I've never played though, so I don't know why pencils are so important.

Here's one more image from the campaign that I lucked out in finding:

Coke Head Samurai

This ad is actually a couple years old. But sometimes things float to the top of the backlog and I have to share them.
So what does it say? Breakdown:

日本 nihon: Japan
の no: possesive (of)
男 otoko: man
よ yo: particle of emphasis, informing, and (archaically) a call for attention
ためらう tamerau: to hesitate
な na: don't do (follows the dic. form of verbs)

gloss: Men of Japan! Don't hesitate [to cut down the other dude]!

Actually, I'm not confident on the gloss, but that's the impression I get, especially after all the Japanese video games I've played. What do you think?

The coke bottle is acting as a 丁髷 (chonmage, a topknot that you see on samurai or sumo wrestlers). Did you know sumo wrestlers have to resign if they lose their topknot? If I was a sneaky sumo coach, I wouldn't hesitate hire a rouge barber to cut out the competition.

Two New Perverted Clay Videos

False advertising! Only one of these is a perverted video.



Link to the next poster contest here.

Next up, Azuki Pepsi tasting!

Bronze Horses ain't fer Ridin'

Hey folks, this is a test post from my iPhone. I figure it may be a good solution on weeks like these where I go, "Meh, too typhoony to write a post. I'm going home*."
So here we have a sign that was in front of a bronze horse at Edo Wonderland in Nikko. Let's break them nihongoes down!

Breakdown:
此の kono: this (bet you didn't know there was a kanji for this word :-p)
馬 uma: horse
乗る noru: ride/mount
べからず bekarazu: should not (a word only used on signs, never spoken. べかざる+noun is the non-sign version)

Gloss: Stay off this horse statue!

I want to call this sign language, but, well... Anyways, there is also a sign-specific use of こと to tell people what they should do. Ex: 五時に集合のこと= gather at 5.
--
*: yes I still live an internet-free life at home. Kinda.

Fencing Vacuums Display

Occasionally, train stations have special promotions happening in them. I like my local station because lots of musicians come (both officially and unofficially). During the summer festival, a vitamin drink company gave out free bottles to whoever was willing to yell "Blastoff!" in Japanese.

This advertisement display with life-size mannequins was in Omiya station a while back:

Ad Breakdown:

Center of the ad:
kibikibi キビキビ energetic
keikai 軽快 light, nimble
saikyō 最強 strongest
pawā パワー power

And here is a TV CM to go with it:



Has anybody out there seen a really crazy promotion going on at a station in Japan?

Japanese in Print: Dragon Quest

It's time for another exploration of the Japanese to be found in adds; I'll try to keep it at an intermediate learner's level. A new Dragon Quest video game recently came out, and people seem to be really interested in it. It's been a popular game series since the 80s, and the characters in the games have always been designed by Akira Toriyama (the Dragonball dude). Akira really outdid himself on one character this time around: The agejō-looking faerie (hit that link for my explanation of agejō). Let's look at her before we take a look at the bigger ad:

She is dripping with the latest Japanese trends. The shorts, the ribbon shoes, the pose... it's all so now. Gotta love it. Another shot:
She does the J girl pigeon-toe even when flying.

And now the ad (click to zoom):

Ad Breakdown:

The Top few lines:
冒険をする時 When on an adventure
大切なことは the important thing
いろいろな人と with various people
話をすることです。is to have conversations
会話 conversation
を通じてby means of
世界で起っていることが the things happening in the world
明らかになれば、 if become clear,
あなたが you
そこで there
何をすればよいかが what should do
次第に gradually
分かってくる become clear
はずです。ought to be

Note that I could translate two things as should, but 何をすればよいかが is literally "what+obj.+ if do+ good+ the question of+sub." or "what would be good to do?" and はずです is "ought to+ be", expressing expectation, but could be should. Another word I often translate as should is べき. It is mostly for stating what one should do in a way that can come off as hoity-toity if not used correctly. You should think about what should means, shouldn't you.

The red circle:
村や町 villages or towns
に入ると when enter
さまざまな人と with various people
出会いますencounter

two とs in this one, but the first is a conditional と (when x is done, y is the result) and the other is the simpler "and/with" と. A third type of と is the quoting one, as in " x と言った". There is a と in the first breakdown, so take a look at that one too.

The bottom line:
困っている人を people in trouble
助けたり helping etc.
事件を cases
解決することで、by solving
物語は story
どんどん rapidly
広がっています spreading out

the たり conjugation of a verb means "doing things like" and is often followed by する even if the verb in the たりform is already する. Example: ゴルフをしたりする=doing things like golfing

I'll leave the dialog shots from the game alone.

Advertisement Japanese: Awesome School Poster

Alright, here is the first of a series of posts I hope to do where we will tackle the Japanese in advertisements I spot about town. But I have a feeling we won't see one like this first one again, a poster for a girl's school in my town. Click to zoom in--this is an iphone-taken picture, and the resolution was surprisingly large.

Ad Breakdown:
Top left verical line, 第三十三回 :
"33rd time". 第 is the "rd" (or "th" or "nd") suffixes to numbers, called ordinals. 回 refers to repetitions of an event.

Top left big characters 鈴懸祭:
The name of a cultural festival held by the school. I don't know how it's pronounced, but I'm guessing suzuka-sai, from 鈴懸の木 (Plane Tree or Tree of Hippocrates, which interestingly enough has festival associated with it in Greece), one of which stands in the courtyard of the school.

The flag, 熊谷女子高校:
"Kumagaya [my town] girls high school", called 熊女 (bear girl) for short. Hey, now the character rampaging about and holding the flag makes sense!

The right vertical text埼玉県立+aforementioned 熊谷女子高校:
the second part you can see translated above, but the first part means "Saitama prefectural" (立 is the postfix that adds "al" (established by) to words like 市立 (municipal) and 町立 (townal, only that ain't a word in English so we say "established by the town").

Area below the bear with an umbrella, 熊姫:
"Bear-princess". A play on the school's nickname.

Area right below that, 乙女の道は一本道:
"The path of the maiden doth not deviate". I took some liberty with 一本道 (straight path). It seems like this is a famous saying (or a variation of one, that one being 女の道は一本道), so I poetrified it. I won't even get into the implications of how 女の道 can mean red-light district too, because our bear princesses are pure! If you don't believe it, they'll claw your eyes out.

The leftovers are just dates, so no need to go into them.　All kinds of interesting things in this poster eh? Not to mention the art. I hope you enjoy this series, because I must admit I'm happy with all I learned this time around.