August 19, 2004

My list

Everyone's doing it, so I took ten minutes to write the top fifty things to do before I die, in no particular order (mostly).

Robert Anton Wilson feels that half the problems in this world arise when people try to make a mark that will allow them to be effectively immortal by being remembered by others. Guess I'm a problem starter.

There is a lot of overlap in these.

1. Write the great American novel
2. Have a nationally published comic series that wins acclaim in the mainstream literary community
3. Create a character that becomes a household name
4. Help establish a utopia, maybe on mars
4. Become ruler of the world, possibly through the Ted Turner route
5. Get married, preferably to a girl who's language I can't speak, so we discover each other without all that superfluous language junk.
√6. Write a story in the cthulhu mythos.
7. Become fluent in Japanese, then 39 other languages as I'm told humans are capable of learning that many.
8. Have one child of my own, then adopt two more from third-world countries
9. Have an art gallery in New York show my work
10. Teach a child that will become the next great artist
11. Resurrect art, as it is dead
12. Create a world wide phenomenon of a movie that will replace star wars in terms of nerdy fanboy adherents
13. Create a theosophical movement that will facilitate dialogue between faiths, creeds and even nations
√14. Never get fat
15. Be called the Charles Atlas of artists/novelists/comicers like Boris Vallejo.
16. Make a comic series that is so successful, that I can have the Japanese make it into an anime.
17. Learn how to play the guitar in such a way as to impress people around the campfire.
18. Learn how to play three songs on the piano in such a way as to impress people at a five star restaurant.
19. Travel back in time and challenge Bruce Lee to a fight.
20. Adhere to the 4 agreements.
21. Learn to control my anxious nature.
22. Find the balance between being mysterious and being aloof
23. When aliens arrive, I will be the person that gets to greet them in the name of Earth
24. Fight zombies with akimbo barettas
25. Have Jonny Dep lean over to me at a party and say, "Okay, Clay. How do you do it?"
26. Star in a major motion picture that doesn't suck.
27. Learn how to constructively assert myself when I have problems with people.
28. Design and buy a zombie-proof house located in Scotland. Said house will have a very large library.
29. Backpack across... everywhere. This will facilitate goals number 7 and 5.
30. Have an opportunity to have my enemies bow before me, then pass it up. Actually, I'd prefer to not have enemies.
31. Have someone say, upon my leaving, "Aren't you at least gonna kiss her?" Then I will look at the girl and say, "nah."
32. Always get catcalls when I'm wearing my swim trunks.
33. Learn how to wield a katana without being a nerd about it.
√34. Talk with strangers like I did during my first year in college.
35. Inspire someone.
36. Impart wisdom.
37. Never stop learning.
38. Expand my vocabulary to incredible proportions.
39. Sell some modern art to a sucker.
40. Achieve a state of zen in which I can ignore my own suffering given any situation.
41. Create a movie called sober master, in which I fight Jackie Chan at an A.A. meeting.
42. Gain a long-overdue nickname.
43. Watch a caribou wander through the ruins of new York.
44. Do my part to help alternative energy take hold, or at least have a hand in anti-matter's successful harvest and isolation.
45. Create the grand unifying theory in the middle working on a crossword puzzle, almost as an afterthought.
√46. Finish this list.
47. Get frozen in carbonite and reanimated in an age when humans have evolved into forms of pure energy.
48. Find satisfaction, and hand a little to Mick Jagger.
49. Stare a guy down in a bar.
50. Add at least ten words to the English dictionary of my own design.

fifty is not enough, I have so much more to do